Blog Entry
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Dancing in the rain
It's already 2:09 in the morning and I'm still unable to sleep. Have been tossing on my bed for the last one hour. In those days when I could not sleep, I'll start counting sheeps, hoping that I would soon be in dreamland. Just now, I tried it again and oh, it seemed that counting sheeps doesn't work for me anymore, or perhaps just for today. Maybe I miss the gals too much, Maybe it's the cartel we had for dinner just now, maybe it's the long walk from Orchard to Esplanade that made me feel so energised now, maybe it's the gastric juices that's affecting my digestive system, maybe it's PMS, maybe it's the conversation we had at that red cosy sofa, maybe it's the quality time we had together, maybe it's the mission that you will be accomplishing for me, or maybe it's just something else which I can't express on this blog.
Sometimes when things happen, you can't help but laugh at it, thinking that it might well be a joke, never realising that anytime soon, you will start laughing at yourself or rather blaming yourself for things that should have happened but is not happening at present.
posted by The voice within @
11:15 AM
0 comments
Thursday, September 21, 2006
In your mighty hands
The past two weeks or so has been perhaps one of the most trying periods for my family. A simple piles operation that my dad had undergone has caused much complications that he had no choice but to have another operation. We were really angry cos the first surgeon did not do a good job for my dad. There was no follow-up done...nothing at all. It's all out of pure negligence that this has to happen.
After his first operation, we were all so worried cos he was unable to urinate. His stomach was bloated like a pregnant woman. After much prayer, he finally passed out some urine. We thought that everything was back to normal since he was able to urinate. However, the following 7 days were horrible. There was pain at his affected area. After the 7th day, he was happy that he actually passed out blood cos to him, he perceived the blood as a post- operative symptom. But we became too worried when he started to go to the toilet every 1 hour. And whenever he stands, blood would flow. When my dad showed me the amount of blood, I was shocked. The toilet bowl was filled with pools of blood. It's at least 5 times worst as compared to menstruation. Worried strickened, we called the ambulance and immediately rush him to Mount Elizabeth. We decided that perhaps he should not go back to the same old doctor in NUH. Aunty Stephanie was really nice. She called her doctor-friend to see to my dad. That night, on sat, he was admitted. He slept through the night without any excretion of blood. On sun, 10 minutes after my mum stepped into the house, we received a call from my dad. He did not say anything but requested my mum to go to the hospital immediately. He sounded really depressed. Sis and I felt that something was not right, so all my siblings tagged along. Before our eyes, he signed the operation form. He was afraid and was shivering. The reason why he went for another surgery was because after my mum left the hospital, he went to the toilet and passed out 3 bowls of blood. At that moment, he felt faint and vision was blurred. He was given blood transfusion immediately. The doctor was really assuring and encouraging. He told us that everything will be fine after the operation. The 1 hour long operation seemed like eternity. After the operation, when my dad was wheeled out of the operation theatre, he was groaning in pain and calling for help. It's saddening to see people close to you suffering and all you want to do is to help him but you just can't. The whole night he was crying for help, and he was asking us to keep praying for him.
Sitting beside his bed, I questioned the Lord like how Job questioned God. I asked the Lord why my dad has to go through the operation this way? why wasn't the first operation a successful one? Why must bad things happen to good people? Lord, do you really like to see your child suffer? I felt that it was so hard to trust God. Yeah, as one of the song lyrics state...God is too good to be mistaken, God is too wise to be unkind. When you experience trials, do you actually believe in this promise? That God is all so loving, so pure and so kind? But as I was doing my QT, God revealed to me that He is in control. Psalm 55:22 "Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall." It is not wrong to question God but perhaps, when things have been entrusted to Him, we should practice simple faith in whom we believe. My dad was right. He was telling me and some of his friends how important health is and how relationship is just as important. He mentioned too that if you have everything in the world- a successful career, lots of cash...but do not cherish your health and people that are dear to you, what's life then? At the end of the day, it zooms down to 'relationships' and the many lives that you want to impact on this earth.
posted by The voice within @
6:55 AM
0 comments
Friday, September 15, 2006
The joy of the Lord is my strength
I think I'll be dead during my birthday celebration cos Sharon Ng's gonna sabo me back. Thankfully, my parents will be there so I doubt she can accomplish her mission. Haha! Most of my friends have turned 21 or are going to turn 21 soon. To some, turning 21 is simply a key to adulthood, where you behave like an adult, you think and act like an adult. In simple terms, you are no longer a child and there must be a sense of maturity. There's also freedom of choice cos turning 21 embarks the start of life's jouney where you have to make major and wise decisions. Every decision we make will result in consequences that will stay on with us for the rest of our lives. Freedom of choice could also means saying 'NO' to something which you feel is rightfully wrong. To add, the liberty to want to be contented in any circumstances is also indeed admirable.
Working can be really tiring at times especially when I have to travel from schools to schools everyday to audit their canteens. I'll just feel so drained, not having the energy to do anything. And talking about BAG, I've not even started Week 1. On my way back home after cell group, I told the Lord that I am going to renew my covenant with Him. And I'm not going to take tiredness as an escape route to spending time with my God. The joy of the Lord is my strength!
Thus far, He has led me and will continue to lead!
In Your strength will I break through Lord!
Through the storm I will hold on Lord!
And by faith I will walk on Lord!
posted by The voice within @
11:51 PM
0 comments
Sunday, September 10, 2006
I'm so thankful I found you
posted by The voice within @
7:50 AM
0 comments
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
A wonderful gathering
posted by The voice within @
10:15 AM
0 comments
Studying- working days
Yes, I'm back to the studying days where I had to do research and work on projects, just that now I'm working. It's all about meeting deadlines because I've been granted a job in this company called Eat Wise Pte Ltd. After months of waiting, I'm glad with what I have now...A permanent job that I believe I will be committed to. I'll be doing things like conducting talks for the community, doing cooking demostrations, writing nutrition articles, visiting nursing homes and children homes, plan programs and interventions, and going to schools to conduct audits and promote health. Fun Fun and more Fun. I'm loving it. Thank you Lord. The days at Deutsche bank was great too cos I really did learn alot of things though I made silly mistakes.
I'm not too sure how on earth I'm going to manage my time from now on. Yesterday, I wrote an article on 'Eating Wisely'. And goodness, it took me 1 whole day to complete it. I really don't have the time. And now I'm stuck with something more challenging. A talk that I have to give to people working in NEA on Tuesday. The worst thing is that I must present it in Chinese. Goodness. I have no idea how I'm going to survive for that one and a half hour session. Thankfully, my ex-tutor was so accommodating in helping me. I guess I have to buck up on my Chinese. It's time to start watching news in Chinese, reading chinese newspaper and speaking proper chinese. Oh Lord, You are the God of all languages, You are the God of Chinese. Please help me.
posted by The voice within @
5:14 AM
1 comments